Let yourself be vulnerable.<\/strong> It\u2019s a pathway to intimacy and it helps you build and maintain trust.<\/li><\/ol>\n\n\n\nHere are 10 questions that will help you to deepen your relationship. Once you get started, don\u2019t be surprised if your 20-minute conversations turn into an hour!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
1. What is your best and worst memory of your childhood?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
Talking about your childhood experiences, both the positive and the things that hurt you can give your partner insight into what has shaped you as an adult. Knowing their beliefs can bring more understanding and appreciation of your partner\u2019s beliefs, ways of being, and differences.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
2. List your three biggest needs, and how can I fulfill them?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
One of the best ways to make sure your spouse feels satisfied and connected is to\u00a0fulfill their needs. Think about the things that are essential to feeling happy in your relationship, and give your partner specific ways that they can meet your needs. This doesn\u2019t mean they are at your beck-and-call, but when they do things that are important to you, how could you not feel even closer?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
3. Of your friends and family, who do you think has the best relationship and why?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
Sometimes people have a hard time articulating what they want or need in a relationship, but they can recognize it when they see it in another couple.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
4. What is the best part about being together?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
As time passes, you grow together as a couple. You\u2019ll continue to experience new things as a couple and your answers may change as the years go by. Revisit this one frequently.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
5. What kinds of things do I do that annoy you, and what kinds of behaviors do you think I should stop or modify?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
You can hope that your partner is honest with you about your behaviors that bother them. This isn\u2019t always so. Some people are\u00a0conflict avoidant\u00a0and they ignore these actions, only to have feelings come out in resentment or rage later. It might hurt your ego, but it\u2019s not realistic to believe that we won\u2019t annoy our partner, even unintentionally. Being proactive can help minimize unnecessary negativity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
6. Does anything keep you awake at night that you haven\u2019t shared with me?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
Sometimes your partner may keep something from you because they don\u2019t want to burden you with their troubles, knowing you have enough stress of your own. When you know each other\u2019s stressors, you can provide support, understanding, and empathy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
7. Is there something that you\u2019ve dreamed of doing but haven\u2019t yet? What\u2019s prevented you from doing this?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
Your partner may have\u00a0different dreams\u00a0than when you first met him. That\u2019s okay. Asking this question gives you insight into what they want and what blocks them from achieving their dreams. You want to be your spouse\u2019s biggest supporter in reaching their goals.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
8. Why do you love me? And when did you feel most loved by me?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s easy to say the three words, thinking that might be enough. But knowing why reminds your partner that you recognize their unique qualities. Also, people love differently and thus they feel loved differently. Differences are inevitable, but it\u2019s important to have ongoing communication about what you both need to feel the most loved by each other.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
9. What would you consider unforgivable and why?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
It\u2019s not surprising for couples to make brief statements like, \u201cIf you cheated I would leave you\u201d or \u201cIf you blew our savings I would get a divorce.\u201d They don\u2019t talk in-depth about the pain that they would feel and why. Knowing in greater detail what would deeply hurt your husband can bring a dose of reality and help protect your relationship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
10. How can we make our sex life better?<\/h4>\n\n\n\n
One of the most vulnerable areas in most marriages, if not the most, is physical intimacy. When a repeated rejection to sex is taken as a personal rejection, disconnection can easily set in.\u00a0Talking about sex is an important part of having a great sex life.\u00a0Be gentle and positive, and focus on the things you need and want (as opposed to what your partner is doing \u201cwrong\u201d or not enough of).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Intimacy suffers when people stay focused on the things that aren\u2019t going well or take the good things for granted. Asking questions and constantly pointing out what you love will help you stay focused on these good things and will help your relationship soar. It\u2019s no secret, but it\u2019s how happy couples stay happy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Questions that make intimacy last a lifetime. Verily Magazine, January 12, 2018Written by\u00a0Anita Chlipala, LMFT Source: https:\/\/www.gottman.com\/blog\/10-questions-happy-couples-constantly-asking-one-another\/ Ah, relationship beginnings. The stream of non-stop texting, the late-night conversations that will make you starry-eyed even into the next morning. Then time passes, you get married, life gets crazy, and you fall into the rut of talking […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2869,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1103,564,1120],"tags":[608,1152,1151,1147],"class_list":["post-2866","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-beyondchai","category-featured-posts","category-healthy-relationships","tag-marriage-advice","tag-muslim-website-for-marriage","tag-online-dating-service-for-muslims","tag-single-muslims"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2866","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2866"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2866\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3126,"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2866\/revisions\/3126"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2869"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2866"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2866"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/beyondchai.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2866"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}